We might know when things are not feeling right but how many women actually do feel able to challenge these allegedly competent doctors. I am guessing that despite your gut feeling that something was not right, you didnt challenge his opinion or ask for a second opinion?

I think you’ve got a good point. I hate to admit it, but I’m a complete wuss when it comes to dealing with the medical profession and always have been. Annoyingly, I can be incredibly assertive with doctors when it comes to dealing with anything to do with my children’s health, and yet when it comes to my own, I tend to sit and listen passively and then regret later that I didn’t speak up more or ask more questions.

I seem to have been through a series of incompetent GPs over the years though. I had the (male)one I’ve mentioned before who refused me a pregnancy test because I was young and unmarried; the (female)one who insisted I had IBS when I knew it was gallstones but who insisted it couldn’t possibly be that ‘cos I was too young to have them (ended up having emergency surgery when the gallstones moved into my bile duct and I became jaundiced); the (female)doctor who refused to have any more dealings with my pregnancy because I insisted on (with the full support of my midwife)having a home birth, and the (male) GP who created obstacle after obstacle when I wanted an abortion.

I also had the (male)house doctor who informed me after I’d had some surgery under general anaesthetic that they’d done an unasked for and totally unrelated gynae exam while I’d been under, but that’s a different story.

So yes, maybe I was too harsh in stating this was a gender issue. As others have pointed out, both male and female GPs can be equally incompetent and lacking in empathy. The trick is to find a good one and stick with them, ‘cos they’re a rarity in my (albeit limited) experience.

As for complaining, I don’t know if I can be bothered to be honest. At the moment I’m more focused on finding out about and dealing with whatever it is I’ve got.

I’ve had various bad experiences with Doctors (usually to do with misunderstanding breastfeeding – our icky female bodies again, eh?) but have lately been lucky to find a really good Doctor who is sympathetic and understanding. Trouble is she has a two week long waiting list most of the time. Wonder why?

I have to say, the genuinely good experiences I have had with the medical professions – by ‘good’ I mean exhibiting humanity and empathy, which ought to be a job requirement – have been only women.

I have had bad experiences with both male and female medics, though. Medical arrogance certainly isn’t gendered.

When I got an IUD fitted, I had a nurse asking me if I had been pregnant or had an abortion in the past while my legs were spread across the table and another nurse was looking. I repeated no, as it was something we had discussed before I took my clothes off (as the size of the IUD depends on whether or not women are nulliparous).

The nurse looks at me and says “are you sure? You uterus is quite big”

“erm, no, really”

She says “okay… but are you certain?”

at that point I was close to lose my shit and say LISTEN LADY, I THINK I WOULD HAVE KNOWN IF I HAD HAD AN ABORTION AND GAVE BIRTH THROUGH MY VAGINA!

He then refused to prescribe any sort of anti depressant despite the fact that said I was constantly bursting into tears as I was eating and sleeping, and there was therefore nothing really wrong with me according to him (being suicidal enough to run to the GP at half past eight having necked an industrial quantity of St John’s Wort that did nothing obviously didn’t count).

And still insisted depression was completely unrelated to menopause despite HRT making me feel instantly better when I finally got it. I make sure I ask for a female GP now (fortunately in the majority at my surgery). And no I didn’t complain, because I just couldn’t be arsed at the time, I just made a mental note to avoid him in future.

My mate had a fibroid the size of a rugby ball. She looked about 6 months pregnant. And she didn’t have a hysterectomy. I think they just go for the easiest option. But there are plenty of alternatives.